Sunday, August 16, 2009

Time Flies...

Spent the day with my first daughter was awesome as always. I cannot believe how big my grandbaby is getting and wow the curls!!! I cherish every minute with them and have to give all my thanks to God for blessing me with such a wonderful relationship with my firstdaughter and her family. I try to explain how it is I feel when I am there, but for some reason the words illude me. I know that I am her first mom, but I also know I am not her mom. Nor do I intend to be. I am no longer jealous of the relationship that she and her mom have, and amazingly enough, have not had those feelings from day one of our first face to face. I really thought that I would, but I think that in my mind all I could see was that tiny little baby. Now it is REAL to me that she is no longer a baby but a grown woman and I am proud that I had some little part in that. Not in raising her, but in nurturing her while she was still apart of me and for being blessed enough to have found a wonderful family. She and her mom are so very close and it tugs at my a good way. :)

They have made me feel welcome and like a part of thier family from day one. It has meant so much to me that they made sure that my first daughter knew about me and about her brothers and sister. I still say that having an open adoption is something I don't think I could have done, but I feel as if in a way that is what we have now. When I was young, it was still too fresh and the pain was unbearable. My feeling is that it would have been like pouring salt into an open wound. The thought of seeing "my" baby with someone else, calling someone else momma, and then having to watch them leave with her everytime would have been too much for me to bear. I have to say that I have an enormous amount of admiration for those first moms who are in open adoptions. I took lots of pics and cannot wait to share...hope everyone had a wonderful weekend and I'll try to post again soon :)

Friday, August 7, 2009

Made it!!!!

This week has been so much fun, but an experience I do not want to repeat...LOL.
Our Church had it's annual week of VBS and it was a blast, but by Wed. everyone was exhausted, teachers and children alike...:(. Last year I had so much fun, learning the songs and the dances that go with, and this year was a whole new ball game. I was with the first graders last year, one classroom over from my oldest son. This year we had twelve two and three year olds!!!
Thank the Lord we had three teachers, as well as two of us had teen daughters that were too old to attend but were able to volunteer and they helped immensely. The girls got to spend the first hour in our small chapel working on the routines for the pre k and four yr olds then they would come help us after that. Setting up snacks and helping to keep the kids entertained by dancing for them while they ate. It was the cutest thing ever :). OOOHHH and the highlite of the week...drum roll, my daughter has her first boyfriend. He goes to the church and actually helped in our room this week. He's really sweet.

I know that this year I will be having my own class, the two yr olds, and so now I have an idea of what to expect. The difference, however, is that this was all week and MDO is only Tues and Thurs, so we get a break in between. Of course, the drawback to that is MDO is a six hour day as opposed to three ...ugh. Really though, I'm thoroughly thrilled, excited and nervous, to be having my own room next year. I'm anxious to get in and start getting my classroom ready and to see how this first year will be. Thankfully, my friend and co worker from Wednesday nights is going to be my assisting teacher. She's great, I love working with her and our kids have a blast together. We are both ready to get started and I'm so happy that we both have the same ideas about what we want and don't want in our class. It's hard to explain, but for me......being able to work with the children of fellow church goers is the most satisfying and enjoyable "job" I've ever had. I feel blessed to have been given the opportunity to care for and get to know these children as well as develop a special relationship with thier parents. Before, it was just the other couples I attended bible class and church with, now it's ....I don't know...just a blessing I never dreamed of.

There is so much more that I could write, but I'll keep it short for now....have a great weekend!!!